A bad day in the pregnant woman’s life

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons is purely coincidental.

Right, a bad day in the pregnant woman’s life goes like this:

You get up in the morning and put on not what you like, but what fits (and the tremendous choice is between three dresses and a stretchy skirt). And there is also only one pair of shoes that will still fit in the afternoon.

You have your first coffee for the day and know for sure it is going to be your last.

You arrive at the gym and everyone is so wonderfully fit and blatantly un-pregnant and they all lift heavy weights and do all these HIIT jumps when you do your low-impact low-weights low-rep stuff.

Later on in the day somebody at work asks you if you are having twins or (worse) triplets (when all you are carrying is a tiny little baby, ONE BABY). I know the belly is huge but seriously TRIPLETS!

You drop three hundred paperclips at work and have to pick each one of them up. Bending IS a struggle.

You get an email from your favorite dress shop and realize the earliest you’ll be able to buy a dress from them will be next spring.

You feel very hot (and I mean, VERY HOT) all day at work but no you can’t take that shirt off because your arms are fat.

You spent 25 minutes doing your make up in the morning but when you go to the shops in your coffee break all people look at is your belly.

Somebody at work tells you that giving birth to a baby was like giving birth to a hot rock and you just can’t get this image out of your head all day.

Three people at work tell you you should sleep while you still can. Come on, shall I just not get out of bed at all for nine months.

As soon as you make a tiny little mistake somebody is bound to say rather proudly “Ah, baby brain!!”. You actually think of start saying in these cases that no, it isn’t baby brain, you have always been just plain stupid.

You are dying for a second coffee in the afternoon and no you don’t want peppermint tea or buckwheat tea,or caffeine free lemon and ginger tea,or apple and elderberry tea (you’ve guessed it,i did study that aisle in the supermarket quite well). All you want is a cup of strong coffee-smelling caffeine-full coffee.

In the evening after a full-on day at work all you want is a glass of wine, and no, not coconut water,not a virgin margarita,not a cranberry juice or a smoothie, just a bloody glass of wine.

P.S. These things luckily did not happen to me all on the same day. Unluckily, they did all happen to. You?

To every good day we have.

xx

Anastasia